Monday, March 29, 2010


I'm seriously so weak today. I've been floating through the day and keep nearly passing out, and my chest hurts something awful. So I ate a Lean Pocket. It'll fill me up a bit and give me some nutrients and shit so I don't like, die or something. I know it's not that serious but I'm prone to overreaction, especially when it comes to my health. I always think I'm going to die.

Here's what today looked like:

Dannon Light & Fit yogurt - 80
Hard-boiled egg white - 16
Lean Pocket (supreme pizza) - 220

Total: 316

Still a respectable number. That's all I'm going to have tonight. The Lean Pocket should definitely hold me until bed. Worst comes to worst, a 35cal clementine. I don't forsee an issue though. Hanging out with my BF, watching movies and such for about three more hours, then home for bed. And when I wake up tomorrow I get to start packing a few things for Florida. Then my mom and I are going to buy a few things I need, like sunscreen and shorts (!) and bathing suits (!!!). I'm excited and nervous all at once.

I figured out that my BMR is 1730. So I burn at least that many calories every single day. That means I've had a deficit every day for...I don't even know how long. A long time. Even when I had that eclair binge I was only at 1535 or something. That made me happy. Oh, and my boyfriend showed me how he can nearly wrap both his hands around his entire waist. He can wear a double 0 in girls jeans. Sonofabitch. He is my thinspiration every single day. Meanwhile, I'm stuck at a size 7 and my hands barely make their way around my hipbones. I am still so HUGE. Ugh.

Hope everyone had a fantastic day!



  1. Hi- I posted this on your last post but you must have just posted this so I wanted to make sure you saw it so I'm reposting. Cheers.

    About the starvation-induced heart attack concern...what happens is your body NEEDS glucose to run your brain and nervous system. It needs from 500-900 calories/day just to keep your heart pumping, muscles contracting, synapses firing, etc. When it does not get glucose from the diet (and you used up all your glycogen, or stored glucose) days ago, it converts protein to glucose to run the nervous system. Note: your body CANNOT convert fat to glucose, only protein. So the first source it turns to is blood proteins. As your body burns blood proteins for fuel, you have less osmotic pressure (ie, stuff holding fluid in your blood vessels). So fluid leaves your blood, which is why your bp drops when you starve. If this happens drastically before your body realizes what happened, your blood will lose so much fluid that there is not enough to pump through the vessels and you have a heart attack.

    In case you will argue that when the body lacks glucose it goes into ketosis and burns ketones to run the CNS...yes that is true and protein burning does decrease but it does NOT stop. So. Please be careful. You are really playing with fire here

  2. Be careful dear :( I don't like that you're on the border of fainting here, that's not good x.x

    Anyhow, fuck, that thing with your boyfriend makes me feel so fat aha, I can't even come close to the two hands thing! Have fun swim suit shopping tomorrow :)

    Be safe,

  3. PROTEIN! try some lo-cal soy protein drinks. sip it throughout the day when you're feeling dizzy or faint. and vitamin water zero. has electrolytes (sp?) and vitamins and stuff but no cals. might help.